Pictures

Here we go.......


I had fun getting the doctors and nurses to pose with Katie's little dog, but really it was great to get this over with and be successful.

Nurse that "prep"ed me with the IV.

Signed more forms but they say it is important.

Doctor Gardner that gave me my voice back.
Thanks so much doctor.....

Mom checking in after the surgery. Note...... laptop was there too to keep you updated...lol.

UMMM Hospital food......no problem eating after either.

Katie coming to rescue her doggie......He helped me get through it all.

Hope you enjoyed the visit and it worked as some of you have heard.

Continued update

It is now 6:00 am the day after surgery. My blood sugar count shot sky high after surgery (not sure why) but with insulin every couple of hours we got it back down through the night. All the other vital signs seemed to be good and I think they will run the blood thinning test first thing to check that this morning and if all goes well, I should be able to go home fairly quickly. For those of you that have checked out of a hospital, you know I am saying that with the old proverbial "tongue-in-cheek". I did actually get a couple of hours sleep in between test and pokes and walks last night so I am feeling fairly good this morning. I am sure when I get home, I will be pretty tired and need a good nap today, but I am so pleased with the way things went. The nurses were great again (trying to get their picture too this morning, but Katie took her stuffed animal doggie home when they came to visit so it will have to just be the nurses if I can get them to come in for a picture).

It appears to have been successful as could be at this point, and they will monitor it for a while and see if they got the right amount of injection (meaning that they pushed it over far enough) and if they did, I will have my voice back for a while. They warned this may not fix everything permanently, but it will be great as long as it does. I ate dinner last night and didn't even choke once or feel like the water was going to go down the wrong place at all. So that part seems to have been fixed with the voice as predicted. Time will tell I guess.

More updates later (with pictures for Gary B. .... he said he just reads the blogs for the pictures.....lol .... but I think he was referring to his kids blogs and pictures of his grandkids)

I have a voice!!!!!!!

The doctor just came in and we tested counting to 10 for the first time and I can talk. It sounds great but I am supposed to not talk for a day or so to keep the stuff they injected leaking back up, but folks...... the prayers worked and I heard my voice again....... Woo hoo it worked......

Yippeeeeee,

I am so excited......

Surgery complete

So here I am sitting in my hospital bed after surgery. Doing great. As promised, it was a quick procedure, but the person ahead of me this morning had complications so I didn't get started till after noon even though I checked in at 9:30. I just laid in the prep bed for a couple of hours. When they finally got me in there they put the gas on me it went really quick. The next thing I knew I was waking up in the recovery room, and I thought they had not finished so I kind of freaked a little. It was weird coming out of the anesthetics. But after a couple of minutes I oriented myself and from then on it was gravy. I recovered there quickly and I was wheeled down to my room for the night just a little after 3:00. It is now 4:30 and I have had 2 cups of broth, 2 cups of red jello and a popsicle. I feel great and wish I could try talking but the doctor doesn't want me to talk for 24 hours so I have to write on a clip board to the nurses and everyone unless Julie is here and she can interpret my (really bad) sign language. I can do a lot better than writing so, I sign, Julie laughs at my signing and then tells the nurses what I want or need. It sort of works.

We accidentally ended up with one of Katie's little stuffed animals in my blanket when I got here so we decided to take pictures for her with the little dog. It will be fun for her to know that her dog went with me to the hospital and we have pictures to prove it. It will be fun for her and you all will probably get a good laugh at me as well taking pictures in the hospital and getting all the doctors to pose with me and a stuffed animal. As soon as I can get them downloaded, I will post them.

So I am supposed to be in here overnight and the way things are going, I see no reason that they won't release me first thing. So I will update as it goes along.

Parents know best

My folks drove down from Salt Lake to be here and we just had a great day today and I was sad it had to end, but I probably need to get some sleep for the procedure tomorrow. This procedure really isn't a huge deal (I have to convince myself too) but I appreciate everyone's prayers and all. We spent the afternoon playing card games and then they came back over tonight and we played some more with the kids. Justin actually won "for the first time in his life"....lol. Then mom and I talked for hours which was a small miracle in itself. Between her health and mine, I was surprised when I saw the time and realized what we accomplished. Sad it had to end but so grateful for the time we could share. Dad just fell asleep sitting upright on the couch but that was good for him too.

Anyway, I just wanted to thank everyone again for the support and the prayers and God willing I will be "talking" to you all soon.

Surgery scheduled

Just got the word. Surgery is scheduled for 9:30 am tomorrow morning. I will stay in the hospital over night and should be back the next morning if all goes well. Thanks to my mom and dad who drove down again from Salt Lake yesterday to be with me and thanks to everyone for their prayers. I also just heard from Dr. Barton and he said the "echo" looked ok and cleared the way on everything else.... so away we go. If all goes well this will be a quick fix and I won't choke any more and possibly be able to talk again. That will be great to talk again for the first time after 6 months.

As I go into this surgery, I have to admit that I have thought long and hard about the past few months and how my life has changed. Many have made mention of the fact that they are impressed with my attitude. I have also told many of you that have come to visit that I never imagined I would react this way to this kind of news (of having cancer). No it has not been easy. Yes, I have had hard times when I felt I could not go on (especially that first chemo treatment), but through it all, my testimony of my Savior, and now my personal relationship with my Heavenly Father, has given me the strength and ability to endure through these hard times and made it possible for me to have the attitude that you all say I have. Really though, it doesn't change anything if you become bitter other than make you more miserable. And I would prefer to not be miserable. Also, my angel wife has been there every step of the way which has helped me in so many ways, but especially in my attitude (well I almost think what she has done for me physically is even greater). I will never be able to repay her for what she has done but I will just try and love her like she deserves.

So to all of you who read this blog for the feelings I might let slip through, there are a few... ( I had someone joke that they just look at my blog for the pictures.....I liked that one... it made me laugh). As for those that are just after the update, I put it first. For every one else, please accept my testimony and I am announcing that my new (sort of long range) goal is to be in Salt Lake at my sister Holly's home coming from their Mission Presidency (hope that doesn't make them "trunky". My new (short range goal) is to come up to Salt Lake in February for a huge get together with my family and friends. So you can tell I haven't given up at all. I am still fighting this thing and if it be God's will, I will endure a while longer. If it isn't his will then I will accept whatever he wants me to do. In the meantime I am just so grateful for my second chances with my family. I thank him daily for that.

Pictures as promised

I love visitors on my "good" weeks.....

As promised a few more pictures of my visitors and then I get to brag about my son. First thanks so much to Lee and Sharon Westover who dropped in at the same time as I was visiting with another good friend from High School.

We all had a very good visit and I am really going to rely on Sharon and her experience in caring for cancer patients. I know the Lord has prepared her as she has been able to help several families in related situations. Now, you could say it was "coincidence" that we happened to have our kids set us up on facebook and then we happened to find each other and then she happened to have first hand experience in supporting and caring for friends with cancer. You could say that if you wanted and hadn't read my last blog entry, but you won't find me saying it. Thank you Lord for sending my friends to me when I need them.

And I need to apologize to Brian. I thought I had told him about this whole thing (after all he is my car insurance guy) but when he called yesterday to say he was down in St. George and wondered if I wanted to go golfing, I realized I was going to have to apologize a lot. So again Brian, I apologize. I felt bad when I told him and kind of ruined his weekend but thanks for coming over to visit (even if we couldn't get out golfing - Lee or Gary will fill in for me I'm sure).

JUSTIN:
Now about my son........ he is so good. From the picture you can see he is first chair in the cello. While that is neat at first glance, you need to understand, he is in 9th grade and this is the "All County Honors orchestra" performance. He also plays with the High School orchestra and is first chair there too. I was so happy to be there last night and that the Lord gave me the strength to stay for the whole thing. I just love hearing him play and he is such a cool kid.


Thanks Justin for the great night of music. I am truly, truly blessed to have a second chance and make up for all the performances and things I missed last year when I was in Rapid City away from my family. You never realize how much it means until it is taken away (as they say) and I was able to have a second chance. Not many people do.


I made it to the very end and even got a picture after with me and my boys....... yahoo. Now it is back to bed and recover....lol.

Tender Mercies - Tiny Miracles

More friends come to visit.... picture proof in a few minutes. Thanks to all the friends that have accepted the challenge of squeezing in a visit while I am feeling good. It helps to have my "good chemo week" be extended. It has been a very satisfying couple of days (golf helps a lot....lol i just wish I had been able to actually swing the club....). This morning, I have been lying awake contemplating some of the discussions I had with my dear friend Dan and his family. His wife Susan related a neat story of a miracle that happened to a friend of hers (and chemo), and again when the conversation contains that much spiritual feeling, it is easy to be touched and affected by it. But then as we were talking some more, we decided that there is another aspect to God's love that is often overlooked (I find myself included in this mistake). Some people call them "tiny miracles" or some of the brethren in conference have also referred to them as "tender mercies". These experiences very often are discounted or discarded as coincidence or "just happened" type scenarios. But as I live longer (day by day is starting to feel more week by week for me now) and I am re-focused on things that matter, I have become acutely aware that those coincidences, very rarely are that (coincidences).

The problem with most of our lives is that by the time we have a chance to recognize something like a tiny miracle that may have happened to us, the unimportant things (that is just what I will call them now) in our lives take over and we aren't able to really recognize it for what it was or is. Also (like my dear friend Sharon said in her visit yesterday) often we have to wait till we get around the next corner before we are able to look back and comprehend (even a little) what the importance of the experience was to us in the first place. As I thought about the events of the past few days and took some time this morning to review some of the things that I experienced, I realized how many of the day to day events had actually been a tiny miracle that we all just accept as part of daily living.

In a way this is what happens to us in listening to the spirit as well. So often the spirit tries to guide us and give us direction, but we are so bombarded with "life" in general and with "lesser important" aspects of living that we start to not recognize the spirit when it does try and help us. At these times we miss out on great learning or growing opportunities or we sometimes even make mistakes that we wouldn't have to make at all. But as my dad was famous for saying "Jim.... did you learn anything from that?" ...... and I realize once again it was an experience I learned from so it wasn't a waste at all. Don't you just love finding out how smart your parents really were. If only we knew. Now if only my kids would think that about their dad too.....lol.

Ok random thoughts for my "4:00 am - can't sleep cause I got too much on my mind - time frame of a Sunday morning......."

Pictures will follow as soon as I download them. I will also tell about Justin's "all - county" orchestra concert last night. Thanks to my oxygen tank and a nice little pain pill, I was able to sit through the entire concert and watch my talented kid perform. I am excited to tell you about that. So stay tuned.....and thanks for listening this morning......