Chemo week - ......checking out for a while.......

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For the next week and a half, I did not keep track of all the events and actually have tried to forget many of them as this was the “10 – 15 day” downhill period of the first session of chemo and any chemo patient will tell you this is probably the most miserable thing they have gone through (or at least one of them). In general you are hit by several back to back periods of diarrhea and other episodes of throwing up and occasionally they hit together. You have very little (if any) appetite and whatever you do get in usually comes right back up shortly thereafter so when you throw up it is generally just “dry heaves” anyway. You have no strength to do anything and you just lay there wishing that it would all be over soon (literally sometimes). There were two distinct times that I can remember specifically where I was sure that I couldn’t do this and wanted to just quit and give up.
Julie was very strong and kept assuring me that she would be there all the way for me and would not let me quit. She was again a rock and at the same time the most compassionate nurse anyone could have asked for. Many times as I would be sitting in the chair next to the bed, just waiting for the next trip into the bathroom, I would feel a hand slip into mine on the bed next me and I would open my eyes to make sure that it was the hand of my wife as I actually thought it was angelic in nature only to realize that it was her hand but it was also angelic as well. She would just lay there and give me of her strength through her touch and I would know then that I could make it.
As the week went on and after a few more days I began to feel better and better so I knew that I was on the upward swing. I spent a lot of time switching between my bed and the (lazy boy) chair next to the bed that Bro. Jennings donated after the wedding to the cause. I watch T.V. and sometimes try and do computer stuff (like this diary) but mostly you just try and make it from one trip to the bathroom till the next.
The people in Rapid City (work) have been absolutely fantastic about supporting me. Especially these past few days. Kevin and Russ have been handling everything and trying hard not to bother me with anything that I don’t need to deal with so I can focus on getting better.