James Arvin Cook
(Jim)
1958 - 2009
Our beloved husband, father, and son, Jim Cook, returned home to his Heavenly Father June 11, 2009, after a courageous battle with cancer.
Jim was born September 14, 1958, in Murray, Utah to Arvin and Darlene Johnson Cook. He graduated from Murray High School in 1976, where he was a cheerleader and member of the swim team. He was a faithful member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, and served a two year mission to Canada.
While attending BYU, he met and married the love of his life, Julie Lynn Faerber, on April 30, 1982, in the SLC temple. He then attended the University of Utah, where he received his bachelors degree in Information Technology. He worked at the U of U for many years as manager of computer network systems. Jim then realized his dream of working for the City of St George, Ut, and later for Rapid City, SD as I.T. director.
Jim's gift to the world was life, laughter, and love. He valued friendships, and spent many hours building relationships on and off the golf course. Jim was always the life of the party, had a joke for every occasion, and could bring a smile to everyone's face. Our memories of Jim will always bring back those smiles.
Serving others in any capacity was Jim's passion. He is deeply loved by his family, and will be greatly missed by friends, family, and everyone who's heart he lightened with his spirit.
Jim is survived by his eternal sweetheart, Julie Lynn Faerber; his five children, Joshua (Kirby) Cook, Brittany (Clint) Lambson, Nicole, Justin, and Katie; his parents, Arvin and Darlene Cook; his parents-in-law LeRoy and Kathleen Faerber; siblings Keldon (Vickie) Cook, Holly (Ken) Peterson, Wendy (Brent) Anderson, Dan (Melanie) Cook, Judy (Matthew) Binns; Julie's siblings; many aunts, uncles, cousins, nieces and nephews, and grandmother Maurine Cook.
A viewing will be held in St George, Monday, June 15th, from 6:30-8:00 pm at the Spilsbury Mortuary, 110 S. Bluff Street. A viewing will be held the following evening from 6:00-8:00 pm at the Brownstone Church, 6410 So 725 East, in Murray, Utah. An additional viewing will be held Wed, June 17th, from 10:00-10:45 am at the same chapel. Funeral services will follow at 11:00 am. Internment will be at the Elysian Gardens. Friends and family are invited to offer their condolences at www.spilsburymortuary.com.
Thank you all so much for your love and support.
Friday, June 12, 2009
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
Tuesday morning
Thanks so much for all your faith and prayers. We can really feel the presence of angels giving us strength and comfort.
Jim is now in that never never land between life and death. He is sometimes coherent, sometimes not. He is fighting the good fight however, and is not giving in easily.
Last week he started wandering around the house a lot, aimlessly. He would walk into the kitchen, stand there, then walk to the living room, stand there, etc. When we would talk to him, sometimes he would understand and respond, sometimes he would close his eyes and not respond at all. He had a hard time being still. Our hospice nurse told us that this is called terminal restlessness. It happens quite a bit in terminal cancer patients.
Jims parents and my parents both came down for a few days to see him. Brittany also is here, she is staying to help. Nicole came down for the weekend, and Jim perked up quite a bit over the weekend. He was lucid, aware, and had a surge of energy that took him through Sunday afternoon. He even wanted to go to Church Sunday, so we all went to the deaf branch with him. He was able to stay for all of Sac Meeting. He ate several meals over the weekend, and we had a wonderful and enjoyable time with all the family being here.
Sunday evening he started to slip back into the restless stage. We have someone with him 24/7, making sure he does not fall or try the stairs. He is not sleeping well at night, kind of walks around the house a lot. Walking is becoming harder for him. It takes him several minutes to stand up, then he stands for a long time before trying to move. The hospice nurse can't believe he can still get himself up, much less walk around the house. He is on a lot of medication for pain, but can't swallow pills so he has drops by mouth. We also have some cream we rub on his wrists, which helps with pain and also calms him.
His vital signs are still strong. His blood pressure is good, and heart beat is even but rapid. He is still breathing well from one lung, and does not seem to be air hungry. That is a blessing. He is still drinking liquids, but not eating solid food. The hospice nurse comes every day now.
He has been quite confused this morning. I asked him if he was hurting and wanted pain meds, and he shook his head no. A minute later he asked Brittany why no one had brought him a drink and his pain meds, because he just told her he wanted them. (He didn't.) We give him pain meds about every two hours, around the clock.
I'm not sure how long he will continue to be mobile, possibly a few days. He is laying on the bed sleeping now. Sometimes when Brittany says hi to him, he will give her the sweetest smile. He seems so innocent and trusting.
We don't know how much longer he will be with us, maybe a few weeks. There is a peaceful, calm feeling in our home, and we know the Spirit of the Lord is here with us. We know there are spirits here from the other side, excited and eager to welcome Jim into the next realm. We are so grateful for the Gospel, and the principle of eternal families. We know that we will be together again in the next life, and throughout eternity.
Jim is now in that never never land between life and death. He is sometimes coherent, sometimes not. He is fighting the good fight however, and is not giving in easily.
Last week he started wandering around the house a lot, aimlessly. He would walk into the kitchen, stand there, then walk to the living room, stand there, etc. When we would talk to him, sometimes he would understand and respond, sometimes he would close his eyes and not respond at all. He had a hard time being still. Our hospice nurse told us that this is called terminal restlessness. It happens quite a bit in terminal cancer patients.
Jims parents and my parents both came down for a few days to see him. Brittany also is here, she is staying to help. Nicole came down for the weekend, and Jim perked up quite a bit over the weekend. He was lucid, aware, and had a surge of energy that took him through Sunday afternoon. He even wanted to go to Church Sunday, so we all went to the deaf branch with him. He was able to stay for all of Sac Meeting. He ate several meals over the weekend, and we had a wonderful and enjoyable time with all the family being here.
Sunday evening he started to slip back into the restless stage. We have someone with him 24/7, making sure he does not fall or try the stairs. He is not sleeping well at night, kind of walks around the house a lot. Walking is becoming harder for him. It takes him several minutes to stand up, then he stands for a long time before trying to move. The hospice nurse can't believe he can still get himself up, much less walk around the house. He is on a lot of medication for pain, but can't swallow pills so he has drops by mouth. We also have some cream we rub on his wrists, which helps with pain and also calms him.
His vital signs are still strong. His blood pressure is good, and heart beat is even but rapid. He is still breathing well from one lung, and does not seem to be air hungry. That is a blessing. He is still drinking liquids, but not eating solid food. The hospice nurse comes every day now.
He has been quite confused this morning. I asked him if he was hurting and wanted pain meds, and he shook his head no. A minute later he asked Brittany why no one had brought him a drink and his pain meds, because he just told her he wanted them. (He didn't.) We give him pain meds about every two hours, around the clock.
I'm not sure how long he will continue to be mobile, possibly a few days. He is laying on the bed sleeping now. Sometimes when Brittany says hi to him, he will give her the sweetest smile. He seems so innocent and trusting.
We don't know how much longer he will be with us, maybe a few weeks. There is a peaceful, calm feeling in our home, and we know the Spirit of the Lord is here with us. We know there are spirits here from the other side, excited and eager to welcome Jim into the next realm. We are so grateful for the Gospel, and the principle of eternal families. We know that we will be together again in the next life, and throughout eternity.
Monday, May 25, 2009
Friday, May 15, 2009
Latest news
Sorry its been so long.
We had a wonderful trip to SLC. Jim was able to see a lot of family and friends, and the trip was great. Thanks to Great Grandma Cook for letting us use the condo, it was perfect! Thanks also to all the U of U people who showed their love and appreciation for Jim at the lunch. It meant so much to him to see all of you and feel your support. It was great to see old high school friends and family!
Josh graduated from college, and Jim and I went to the graduation lunch with Josh and Kirby. It was wonderful, we are so proud of all his hard work!! Nicole came down and spent several days with us between semesters, we really loved spending some time with her.
We have been working hard with Jim and the hospice nurse the control the cancer pain. He is doing pretty well for the most part, just very tired. He sleeps a good part of every day, but is still able to wake up and participate in some activities. Justin has had several performances the last few weeks, for the school musical, jazz band, and orchestra. Jim made it to everything but the jazz band, and really enjoyed seeing Justin perform. Katie also had a performance for her fourth grade class, and Jim was there to cheer her on!
We did something last weekend that we have not done for a very long time. We saw a movie at the movie theater!! :) We saw the Star Trek movie, and Jim made it through the entire show! It was so great, we did popcorn and drinks and the whole thing. I think I may have enjoyed it more than he did... lol ... but we both had a good time.
Between all the performances and the movie, we pretty much wore Jim out. He has had several days of sleeping and not much else. His feet have swollen to about twice the normal size, and he has lots of numbness and tingling in his hands and feet. He threw up again today, has not done that for a while. For the most part, the nausea has stopped, although sometimes it just comes on for unknown reasons.
He is still unsteady on his feet, and fell again last week, this time outside on the cement. He bruised his ribs and scraped his arm, but didn't break anything. He uses the walker most of the time when we go out, sometimes the wheelchair. He still eats, but not as much. He likes fruit and fudge bars (which is not good for his diabetes), but we just kind of feed him whatever he wants. He still loves to watch movies, although he dozes off a lot in the middle of them. It takes a lot of energy for him to talk, so he is very quiet most of the time.
He did have a good day yesterday, and we went to his Uncle Lou's house to sit in the hot tub. That helped his feet feel better.
We love our hospice nurse. She comes over twice a week to check on Jim, make sure his pain is under control, orders his pain meds, and takes his vitals. We have also had some aids come to help us move furniture and do errands. This is much easier on Jim than the constant trips to the Dr and hospital. We are grateful for the hospice program, and the wonderful people who work with us.
We are so grateful for the Gospel, for the knowledge that we have that life will continue for us on the other side of the veil. We are grateful for all the angels here and on the other side who give us strength and support.
We had a wonderful trip to SLC. Jim was able to see a lot of family and friends, and the trip was great. Thanks to Great Grandma Cook for letting us use the condo, it was perfect! Thanks also to all the U of U people who showed their love and appreciation for Jim at the lunch. It meant so much to him to see all of you and feel your support. It was great to see old high school friends and family!
Josh graduated from college, and Jim and I went to the graduation lunch with Josh and Kirby. It was wonderful, we are so proud of all his hard work!! Nicole came down and spent several days with us between semesters, we really loved spending some time with her.
We have been working hard with Jim and the hospice nurse the control the cancer pain. He is doing pretty well for the most part, just very tired. He sleeps a good part of every day, but is still able to wake up and participate in some activities. Justin has had several performances the last few weeks, for the school musical, jazz band, and orchestra. Jim made it to everything but the jazz band, and really enjoyed seeing Justin perform. Katie also had a performance for her fourth grade class, and Jim was there to cheer her on!
We did something last weekend that we have not done for a very long time. We saw a movie at the movie theater!! :) We saw the Star Trek movie, and Jim made it through the entire show! It was so great, we did popcorn and drinks and the whole thing. I think I may have enjoyed it more than he did... lol ... but we both had a good time.
Between all the performances and the movie, we pretty much wore Jim out. He has had several days of sleeping and not much else. His feet have swollen to about twice the normal size, and he has lots of numbness and tingling in his hands and feet. He threw up again today, has not done that for a while. For the most part, the nausea has stopped, although sometimes it just comes on for unknown reasons.
He is still unsteady on his feet, and fell again last week, this time outside on the cement. He bruised his ribs and scraped his arm, but didn't break anything. He uses the walker most of the time when we go out, sometimes the wheelchair. He still eats, but not as much. He likes fruit and fudge bars (which is not good for his diabetes), but we just kind of feed him whatever he wants. He still loves to watch movies, although he dozes off a lot in the middle of them. It takes a lot of energy for him to talk, so he is very quiet most of the time.
He did have a good day yesterday, and we went to his Uncle Lou's house to sit in the hot tub. That helped his feet feel better.
We love our hospice nurse. She comes over twice a week to check on Jim, make sure his pain is under control, orders his pain meds, and takes his vitals. We have also had some aids come to help us move furniture and do errands. This is much easier on Jim than the constant trips to the Dr and hospital. We are grateful for the hospice program, and the wonderful people who work with us.
We are so grateful for the Gospel, for the knowledge that we have that life will continue for us on the other side of the veil. We are grateful for all the angels here and on the other side who give us strength and support.
Friday, April 24, 2009
SLC trip.
OK, here is the plan for the weekend. We will be at Jims parents house on Saturday from 10:00 am to about 5:00 pm. Anyone who wants to visit us there, that would be great.
Address: 614 Wilford Avenue, Murray, Utah
Its about 6200 south, find the street (Wilford Ave) off of 725 east. Actually, look it up on the internet :) Monday Jim is having lunch with some former work friends, then a little get together with some High School friends in the evening. Tuesday is another free day, probably be at his parents house again.
We would love any and all visitors!!! Jim really wants to see as many people as possible while we are in town.
Address: 614 Wilford Avenue, Murray, Utah
Its about 6200 south, find the street (Wilford Ave) off of 725 east. Actually, look it up on the internet :) Monday Jim is having lunch with some former work friends, then a little get together with some High School friends in the evening. Tuesday is another free day, probably be at his parents house again.
We would love any and all visitors!!! Jim really wants to see as many people as possible while we are in town.
Thursday, April 23, 2009
Quick update
After much prayer and consideration, Jim and I both feel that hospice is the best option for him now. Its a good program. We will have a nurse come in twice a week to check on Jim, take his vitals, and she orders all his medications. There is also a nurse on call 24/7 if we ever need a nurse in an emergency situation. We can have an aid come in if needed to help with any additional needs we may have. They will even come and stay with Jim if I need to run errands or need a break, so that he won't be alone. They will also provide any medical equipment, such as a hospital bed or shower stool, if we have need of that. They have social workers who will help with bereavement, funeral arrangements, emotional support or whatever else you need. It is a service designed to make the last several months of a persons life easier in whatever way they can. Our Relief Society President is the nurse who will be caring for Jim, and she is a wonderful, loving person. We are grateful to have her.
Jim has a few things that he would really like to do, and the first is to travel to SLC to spend time with family and friends there. We are driving to SLC on Friday, and will be there until next Wed. We would love to see anyone who has a chance to visit with Jim. (Jim lost his cell phone, so please call mine.. 801-201-0935 if you need to make arrangements.)
He also would like to visit Rapid City one more time, so we are trying to arrange to go there towards the end of May. We'll keep you updated on that.
This is a difficult time, but we feel the sweet peace of the spirit in our home. We know that God is mindful of us, and that His plan is being fulfilled. Thanks again for all your prayers, love and support.
Jim has a few things that he would really like to do, and the first is to travel to SLC to spend time with family and friends there. We are driving to SLC on Friday, and will be there until next Wed. We would love to see anyone who has a chance to visit with Jim. (Jim lost his cell phone, so please call mine.. 801-201-0935 if you need to make arrangements.)
He also would like to visit Rapid City one more time, so we are trying to arrange to go there towards the end of May. We'll keep you updated on that.
This is a difficult time, but we feel the sweet peace of the spirit in our home. We know that God is mindful of us, and that His plan is being fulfilled. Thanks again for all your prayers, love and support.
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Whats new
Jim has asked me to take over writing the blog for a while, so here is the latest.
Jim was having a lot of problems with the radiation, so we decided that it was probably harming him more than helping him. We stopped after seven treatments. His ability to swallow has been getting better, along with his appetite. He is not so sleepy, and is able to get around a little better, although he has fallen twice in the last week here at home.
Tuesday we went in for the second round of chemo. While there, they did a blood test (PT/INR) to check the thickness of his blood. He has been on a medication to thin the blood since last Oct, when he got blood clots in his arm. This medication is tricky to dose, and they do blood thickness tests once a week. We are constantly changing the dose of the medication, depending on how his blood looks for that week. Normal blood is about 1, and with the medication they like his to be between 2 and 2.5. When they did the test on Tuesday, his blood was 7.9, which is very very thin. They called the Dr, had us stop the medication, and scheduled another PT/INR for today. We went in this morning, and his blood is still very thin, 5.9 today. They scheduled another test for Sunday morning.
While we were at the hospital, Jim got up to use the restroom. He got very dizzy and almost fell, but the nurse caught him. They sat him down and looked at his eyes, and found that one pupil was significantly more dilated than the other. They checked his speech and reflexes, and then called the Dr again. We went straight over to the Dr office, and met with the on call Dr. Our regular oncologist has been out of town for a few weeks. She called to talk to Dr Richards (radiation Dr) about Jim. She originally wanted to do an MRI, because they feel that cancer growth in the brain is causing these additional symptoms. However, after consulting with Dr Richards, they feel that Jim is too weak to undergo any type of treatment for cancer in the brain, and so decided not to do an MRI. It would only confirm what we already suspect, and we would not treat anyway. They feel that maybe the best course of action at this point is to go on Hospice. The chemo does not seem to be slowing the growth of the cancer, and is hard on Jims body. We have not decided what we are going to do, we are considering all the options.
Easter was a beautiful day here in St George, a little windy but sunny and warm. After Church, we took the kids to the park and had a picnic. After we ate, Jim and I lay on a blanket in the grass, and the kids played soccer and hit a tennis ball around. It was really nice.
Jims brother Kelly came to visit for several days last week. It was nice to see him, and he and Jim had a good visit. Grandma Cook and Becky drove down from SLC last Thursday. They came over to see Jim, stayed for about an hour, then drove back to SLC on Friday. Grandma is still looking good, 95 years young and still full of energy! It was really nice to see her.
It is rainy and cold today. Jim is snuggled up on the couch in the living room, watching movies. Please continue to pray for us. We know that the Lord will give us strength equal to the task.
Jim was having a lot of problems with the radiation, so we decided that it was probably harming him more than helping him. We stopped after seven treatments. His ability to swallow has been getting better, along with his appetite. He is not so sleepy, and is able to get around a little better, although he has fallen twice in the last week here at home.
Tuesday we went in for the second round of chemo. While there, they did a blood test (PT/INR) to check the thickness of his blood. He has been on a medication to thin the blood since last Oct, when he got blood clots in his arm. This medication is tricky to dose, and they do blood thickness tests once a week. We are constantly changing the dose of the medication, depending on how his blood looks for that week. Normal blood is about 1, and with the medication they like his to be between 2 and 2.5. When they did the test on Tuesday, his blood was 7.9, which is very very thin. They called the Dr, had us stop the medication, and scheduled another PT/INR for today. We went in this morning, and his blood is still very thin, 5.9 today. They scheduled another test for Sunday morning.
While we were at the hospital, Jim got up to use the restroom. He got very dizzy and almost fell, but the nurse caught him. They sat him down and looked at his eyes, and found that one pupil was significantly more dilated than the other. They checked his speech and reflexes, and then called the Dr again. We went straight over to the Dr office, and met with the on call Dr. Our regular oncologist has been out of town for a few weeks. She called to talk to Dr Richards (radiation Dr) about Jim. She originally wanted to do an MRI, because they feel that cancer growth in the brain is causing these additional symptoms. However, after consulting with Dr Richards, they feel that Jim is too weak to undergo any type of treatment for cancer in the brain, and so decided not to do an MRI. It would only confirm what we already suspect, and we would not treat anyway. They feel that maybe the best course of action at this point is to go on Hospice. The chemo does not seem to be slowing the growth of the cancer, and is hard on Jims body. We have not decided what we are going to do, we are considering all the options.
Easter was a beautiful day here in St George, a little windy but sunny and warm. After Church, we took the kids to the park and had a picnic. After we ate, Jim and I lay on a blanket in the grass, and the kids played soccer and hit a tennis ball around. It was really nice.
Jims brother Kelly came to visit for several days last week. It was nice to see him, and he and Jim had a good visit. Grandma Cook and Becky drove down from SLC last Thursday. They came over to see Jim, stayed for about an hour, then drove back to SLC on Friday. Grandma is still looking good, 95 years young and still full of energy! It was really nice to see her.
It is rainy and cold today. Jim is snuggled up on the couch in the living room, watching movies. Please continue to pray for us. We know that the Lord will give us strength equal to the task.
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